These kind of Are generally The actual Finest sex dating sites Pertaining to Absolutely no Strings Connected Sex
Before, there were marriage agencies, which organized meetings from A to Z. Today, it is done via the internet and its dating sites. “And it’s fucked up in one or the other case”, concedes Jean Van Hemelrijck, at the microphone of Véronique Thyberghien.
On these dating sites, it’s like in marriage agencies, the heritage of people to meet is naturally “inflated”. That is to say that when you walk on these sites, the people you “meet” really make you want to be met. But the reality is ultimately different. “Today,” explains the psychologist, “the new sites are pushing straight for much more direct sporting prowess, invitations to one-night stand without foreplay. It creates a sociological phenomenon which is very astonishing, namely how quickly things are happening. “
On these sites, you just have to log in and you have a whole bunch of people at your disposal who are ready to meet you within half an hour, to have sex for half an hour. Without speaking, presenting or seducing, and without emotions as well. The act is thus quickly done, and seems to work because in a number of cases, this act fulfills astonishing functions. Many people seem to thrive in this kind of “relationship”. However, for Jean Van Hemelrijck, “one can really wonder about this way of being with the other. The fact that it is about a dating site is announced in the title, there is no evasions. Discretion and hypocrisy therefore have no place there. “
The clarity of dating sites seems more evident on the Flemish side, as do swingers clubs elsewhere. But what is also striking is that it is all in the end very organized, very timed: if the person realizes that they have 30 free minutes in their schedule, they connect to the site to quickly find someone. .
First of all for one-to-one sexual relations: “Sex is easier when there is no relationship on the side”, explains Jean Van Hemelrijck. “On these dating sites, there is a real dissociation: sex is freed from any relational space. This is why sociologically, we have been able to observe that this is where people who separate are going to take refuge. In the shock of the marital separation, the one who remains wonders what is still worth in the love market and he will seek the answer on this kind of site. “
Dating sites reduce sex to its simplest form. Should we banish this “body-to-body” that we find there? For Jean Van Hemelrijck, “there is something reassuring, enriching but also violent. We are dealing with feelings which are not in love, but more brutal stripping. And above all, behind, we find a hold of risk, this famous fantasy of sex which is not transformed into a place of appeasement but of confrontation. Instead of doing 200km / h on the highway, we ring at a door without knowing who is behind, but we know that 3 minutes later, we will be naked and we will make love with this person, which presents a risk. Will she be pretty, soothing, frequentable, and faithful to the image posted on the site, or on the contrary, Will it be a big lascard who could be violent, a dirty woman who is there to swallow us, ….? It is very clearly a transformation of the sexual relationship: we are in a society that likes risk, and sex can become a space for experimentation with danger. In the end, if we come out alive, it gives us a feeling of power. , which we might have lost when we separated. “
“The therapeutic effectiveness of such an act is obviously very limited in time”, warns the psychologist, who explains that there is also a very destructive side to being able to take part in such an act, both for oneself and for the other. “At the same time, this destruction is generated by our society: you can find great things on the internet, but at the same time, it takes away the time that passes. When you flirt with someone in real life, it takes time, it has to have with the tuning, that is to say to be in connection with the other, to meet him, to seduce him, to please him, to be touched, … It is a love parade which can be very fascinating but which is linked to the passing of time. Internet is the producer of the snapshot, it has made waiting disappear. But at the same time, the snapshot means that there is no after, we feel even more alone, desperate and aggressive … “, concludes Jean Van Hemelrijck.